Archive for Career

Don’t Count Your Eggs Before They Hatch

A lot has been happening in my life.

I’ve had a lot of really exciting opportunities for which I’m incredibly thankful, but I’ve also had many potential opportunities that fell through. Sometimes they fell through based on my inability to do the work, sometimes it just wasn’t the right fit and sometimes it was no fault of my own and extenuating circumstances got in the way.

Starting out, I would get overly excited about these opportunities. They would spark an excitement in me that, frankly, was hard to contain. When they fell through though, I would be crushed.

Experience has taught me better than to count on something like that for any measure of success and self worth. The truth of it is your self worth doesn’t depend on what you’ve accomplished, although you can be proud of yourself, self worth comes from within. Read More →

Please Consider Supporting Me on Patreon

Hey Schizoblog followers,

Mike Hedrick here, your loyal writer. This past week I made a post about struggling to support myself and Matt left a comment saying a could join Patreon to get some help with my efforts on the schizophrenia blog.

My page can be found here: https://www.patreon.com/thehedrick

For those of you who don’t know (as I didn’t) Patreon is a tool used by creators to fund their projects through the support of patrons like you. When you pledge to support my work, each month pattern takes your pledges and allows me to use them for hosting the blog, paying my bills and general life satisfaction.  Read More →

You Can’t Force Things to Happen

It’s been tough getting to sleep the last few nights.

I’ll go to bed and turn off the light and then the thoughts start pouring in. I’ll worry that I didn’t do the right thing in any number of situations during the day or I’ll worry about the work I have to do the next day or I’ll worry that no matter what I do, I’ll never be closer to my dream of buying a house in the mountains.

It occurred to me last night while I was lying there though, that you can’t force sleep. If you try to fall asleep and see that you’re not, that’s just one more thing to worry about. The sleep will come, it always does and there’s no point in trying to force it to happen.

The thought then occurred to me that that notion is true for a lot of things, love, success, peace and life in general.

Read More →

It’s Ok to Take it Easy Sometimes

This past few weeks has been pretty chaotic for me.

Money has been an issue, I moved to a new city, my nephew was born, I got a new writing job, I had my 29th birthday, I had to housesit for a while and on top of everything else I’ve been working myself into a tizzy over a potential relationship which may or may not work out.

All said and done, I came to the realization last night that yes, I had done it, I had overwhelmed myself wholly and completely.

Stress can be a killer, even more so for someone who has a mental illness. Read More →

What To Do About Burn Out

We all know what it feels like when you’ve had enough. It’s that listless weary feeling of not wanting to proceed but knowing that you have to.

Some refer to it as ennui others simply call it burn out.

It happens when the stress of performing a certain task overrides its enjoyment and it can take place in every facet of your life, from your job, to your home life to your relationships.

Many people have trouble with burn out when they feel tired or obligated about something. The truth is, everyone has things they might not enjoy doing but are required to do to maintain their current life situation. Read More →

New Article at The New York Times!!

Hey guys,

just a heads up that I have a new article at The New York Times today.

Feel free to head on over and check it out!!

Click Here!

-Mike

 

Balancing Stability and Ambition

For years I’ve been balancing on a tightrope, swaying this way and that while I reach for bigger and better things on the one side, but am knocked down by increasing symptomatic concerns on the other.

That’s the way it is when you have a mental illness.

On the one hand you want to achieve, you want desperately to earn more money so you can get off government assistance, so you can move out of your section 8 apartment and so you can see a private psychiatrist but your illness doesn’t allow it.

For every step toward financial stability you make, you take one step into behavioral and emotional instability.

You want independence, but that independence comes at the price of forfeiting your mental stability.

This has been the one overarching struggle for me in my efforts to get better. Read More →

Whatever You’re Dealing With, Just Know, It’ll Pass

Throughout my ten years of living with schizophrenia there have been times of great stress and great paranoia. There have been times where I’ve been so overwhelmed by delusion that I couldn’t eat. There have been times where I’ve been so anxious and worried about interactions that I’ve forgotten to breathe.

In all honesty I’ve spent a good deal of time in a place so scary that I wouldn’t wish it on an enemy.

I know what it’s like to be so consumed in the moment by things that you lose your grasp on reality and every single time, without fail those moments have passed and I’ve come out the other side.

That’s the point I want to make here.

The simple fact of the matter is that whatever hardship you’re facing, whether it’s delusions or paranoia or voices or hallucinations, in every instance, those moments have passed. They always have and they always will.

I realize this is an extremely hard thing to remember in the heat of the moment when you feel like you can’t breathe but if you can just ease your shoulders a bit and give it time, whatever you’re dealing with will pass.

If I can make any guarantees in this crazy messed up world, that’s it. That this will pass.

This is applicable in lesser moments of stress as well. Maybe you’re facing stress from your job or you’re in a painful crush or relationship. In every instance with a little bit of time and a few deep breaths these moments, these hardships will pass.

There is nothing you won’t be able to get through if you just give it a little time and a little care.

Any moment you’re facing where things seem insurmountable has to break at some point sometimes you have to break it, sometimes it breaks naturally but in each and every case, with a little time whatever you’re up against will pass and you’ll find yourself on the other side of it saying, “That wasn’t so bad.”

If there’s any advice you’ve gleamed from my years of writing trying to help people who are struggling it’s that.

There is no obstacle in this world besides death that you won’t be able to get through.

That’s one of the major lessons mental illness has in store for you when you’re diagnosed and it’s the one piece of advice I give to anyone who’s looking for help. Just know that with time, it’ll pass and in a year whatever you’re facing right now won’t even matter.

It’ll pass, it always does it always will.

Again I know how hard it is to realize that in the moment of something trying whether it’s seemingly insurmountable or just inconvenient, just having that little dose of awareness though can help you get through whatever you’re dealing with.

I’ve been through my share of hardship and I wish that they had told me in the hospital that it will take time but you can always get better, there’s plenty of time and there’s no rush in anything and whatever is happening will have it’s day and then it will leave you alone.

That’s just the way life works. Just know that it’ll pass.

Like what you read here? If so, please consider supporting me on Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/thehedrick

Trying to Handle The Stress of Obligation

I’ve been having some burnout recently. There was an article in Inc. Magazine last week that discussed a study showing that burnout might actually be depression. Personally I’ve found that to be true in small components.

With burnout there exists that same level of apathy and exhaustion when faced with impending tasks and deadlines and the same hopeless feeling that what you are doing isn’t getting you anywhere.

These are minor though, as I view depression as a serious manifestation of these issues as well intense sadness and suicidal ideation and I feel like I have a good handle on what separates the two having experienced both.

What I want to talk about today though is the point at which you experience burnout but can’t take steps to remedy it because it causes stress.

Stress is not a good thing for people with mental illness. I’ve talked about the light switch effect wherein too much stress automatically flips on paranoia and delusion regardless of the steps you take (medication/therapy) to combat these things. Read More →

Trying to Succeed as a Person With Mental Illness

As a person with schizophrenia, it’s all too easy for me to get caught up in the flurry of trying to make money, trying to be successful and trying to get an as-yet undetermined place in my career where all my problems will be over.

I’ve been stressing myself out on the daily trying to jockey a better position either for my writing or photography, and as we all know, stress is not good, especially for a person with mental illness.

I’ve talked about the lightswitch effect wherein a compounding amount of stress is the lightswitch for symptoms to flare up. I’ll get worked up and then I’ll get paranoid and then I’ll get delusional and before I know it I’m taking another trip to the U.N. thinking I’m a prophet.

The point of all this is to say that it’s way too easy to lose yourself in the ambition of trying to succeed.

People with mental illnesses have to be extra careful in that regard. Read More →